Dear Tony,
I go in cycles. That never ends, even when you become better. Hopefully, the intensity changes -- in down times, you may grow less depressed, stop thinking of drastic measures. But dealing with ups and downs is part of life. Nobody is completely stable all of the time.
As I have said before, one reason for that is that life is not completely stable. The outside world is certainly not constant and stable. We can't totally divorce ourselves from the world for long periods of time. That is a form of insanity in itself. But figuring out how to handle it, how to let it in without letting it overwhelm us is a complex, personal skill which many people, both sick and healthy, struggle to learn.
For me, if I am dealing with stresses I can't control, I have learned to change what I can control. I have learned to make parts of my life I can handle as calm and comforting as possible. Often, I need to revert back to habits I may have given up; eating certain foods I don't eat anymore, watching television shows I no longer watch. Usually sleeping more. I have found the first step to dealing with this stress is to find something in my life which is soothing and comforting. Once I am there and I am calmer I can start to think of other strategies to handle the situation.
If you are overwhelmed, limit the new or stressful situations in your life as much as you can. Find ways to calm yourself down. Then try to figure out ways to handle possible situations.
